


not everything is set in stone

by orphan_account



Category: Jessica Jones (TV)
Genre: Character Study, Gen, Misses Clause Challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-14 22:47:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13017771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Jessica refuses to be called a hero, discuss 'feelings', or acknowledge this painfully joyful time of year.Leave it to Trish to be the one who starts to change her mind about all these things.





	not everything is set in stone

**Author's Note:**

  * For [breathedout](https://archiveofourown.org/users/breathedout/gifts).



Being a hero didn't mean shit to Jessica. She just wanted to pay her rent and be able to make it through the day without thinking of that bastard, Kilgrave.

Saving the city once was a fluke, and the same could be for the second time. Jessica's only real motivation to do seemingly heroic things was to keep those she cared about safe. If the damned people in this city wanted to view Jessica as some kind of savior, then so be it. She simply ignored them and refused to embrace the ridiculous idea that she was any kind of hero.

A few weeks after New York City nearly got itself destroyed again, Jessica continued to cling to that sentiment. The one who truly deserved to be called a hero was the red horned asshole who sacrificed himself.

She must've been drifting off into these depressing thoughts while her and Trish sat in the back of the coffee shop for their weekly morning coffee that particular morning. The only reason Jessica came to this realization is because Trish's voice got louder and louder until Jessica snapped out of it. Jessica tried to brush it off, but Trish knew her to well for that to happen.

“What were you saying Trish?”

“Nothing important,” Trish said with a frown. “So, Jess, I know you hate this, but I want you to know anytime you want to…”

She trailed off, but Jessica knew what Trish was trying to say, and with a headache raging from her most recent hangover, she could do without hearing the spiel. When the pain shifted to a dull throbbing rather than feeling like there was a jackhammer in Jessica’s fucking head, she’d be more willing to listen.

“Trish don’t ask me how I am because that’s the last fucking thing I want to talk about. I’m still hungover,” Jessica said, ironically taking a sip of whiskey-tinged coffee.

Beside her, Trish sighed and gave Jessica one of those incredulous looks of hers. “Jess, haven’t we addressed the fact that drowning your feelings in alcohol isn’t the healthiest way to go about it?”

Jessica shrugged, taking a sip of her coffee before answering. “Yes, we have, but I’m choosing to ignore all of those past conversations in favor of denial. You know how much I love staying in denial, Trish.”

She didn’t have to be looking at Trish to know she was rolling her eyes and scoffing at Jessica’s response. The whole week had been an clusterfuck. Between trying to save the city with some ass-backwards team, and then actually succeeding, Jessica was more than drained, both physically and emotionally.

Trish meant well, she always did, but Jessica wasn’t in the mood for talking; just drinking and large amounts of denial.

“I don’t want to see you spiral back out of control, Jess,” Trish murmured in a soft tone that nearly stopped Jessica in her tracks.

“You’re doing a terrible job at not talking about this.” Jessica muttered.

“Okay, fine. How about we discuss your plans for Christmas?” Trish conceded the discussion about feelings, but then shifted to talking about an annoyingly cheerful holiday Jessica hadn’t seen the point of in years.

Leave it Trish to totally blind side her with Christmas discussions. It was almost as bad as Malcolm trying to decorate the Alias Investigations office, which also served as her fucking home. Jessica still couldn’t get the sight of that hideous reindeer and snowman decoration out of her mind.

Besides the week from hell, this was also why Jessica upped her intake of alcohol as of late. Fucking holidays and the fucking cheer that came with it.

“Let’s just skip the banter and go straight to the part where I reluctantly accept the offer to spend Christmas with you.”

Trish sighed. “Jess, I don’t expect you to be the pinnacle of holiday cheer. I just would like it if you made a small appearance at my place around the twenty fourth. It doesn’t even have to be a long visit. Perhaps an hour tops.”

The holidays were never an easy time for her, but for Trish, Jessica could at least perform the bare minimum required for spending obligatory time with family during the holidays. She never minded spending time with Trish, but during the holidays Jessica wanted to brood; something she preferred to do without an audience.

“No attempts to get me to discuss my feelings, or any mention of any three of those testosterone-filled idiots and I’m in,” Jessica counter offered with a hand outstretched towards Trish. “Deal?”

Trish gave Jessica a soft smile and took a firm grasped of her hand in order to seal said deal and make it final. “So, should I finish what I was saying before?”

She lifted up her coffee (which was even heavier on the whiskey than normal) and nodded. Trish repeated her earlier comments about some new segment going on with her radio show. Unbeknownst to Trish, Jessica listened to the radio show almost daily. This went on even during the few months Jessica was actively avoiding her.

It was soon after Trish finished talking that Jessica recalled what she was supposed to be doing that afternoon. Jessica needed to head downtown to check on some woman. Her wife remained convinced she was guilty of infidelity. Those type of cases were straightforward and typical, but after the last one lead to Jessica going against the Hand, she welcomed a small sliver of normal.

“I need to get going, Trish,” Jessica announced once every last drop of her coffee had been consumed. “Cheating spouses to follow and all that usual bullshit.”

“Be safe, Jess.”

“I'm always safe, Trish.”

Jessica left the coffee shop with hands shoved deep into the pockets of her beat up leather jacket. The frigid wind whipped against Jessica's skin, but her scarf was still draped over her desk chair. She couldn't wear it since that idiot stayed behind so they could all escape.

If there was once thing Jessica hated, it was feelings; especially negative ones. Maybe Trish was right when it to talking about this crap. It wouldn't hurt for Jessica to try to talk about the things bothering her, but the drinking method was working so well.

Why stop now?


End file.
